Change

Things change all the time.  Sometimes things change and it’s good right then, sometimes the good isn’t seen until later.  With change comes new things, but it also means a loss.  The loss isn’t always bad, but unfortunately, sometimes the loss seems to weigh more than the good of the change. 

When we moved to Illinois three and a half years ago (wow, has it really been that long?!) we fell into place with a small group that was amazing for us.  We already knew some of the people from Florida, but others were new to us.  This group of people made leaving our amazing friends behind and transition to Illinois a lot easier.  Having a close group of friends is and has always been very important to me. 

People came and went from our small group, and it was hard to accept some of the changes, but change happens.  New people came and loss occurred.  Our closest Illinois friends moved to Boise a couple years ago and we’re still bummed about that. 

Myles preaches at a small country church about an hour away.  It’s been a good experience for the most part, but I think it’s kept us from building relationships locally.  Our role in a church like this has not accommodated for spiritual growth and communal worship. We’ve probably relied too much on our small group to fill that role in our lives.  This group served the entirety of our social lives and a very large part of our spiritual community. 

When small group sort of disintegrated we were left with a big hole.  It’s been weird.  We understand that people are busy and everyone has kids now.  We are busy too and have to make time for the things most important to us.  Recently, we have joined with a couple other families from the previous small group, hoping to reestablish something.  So far I have high hopes and think it will be successful in terms of meeting regularly and will be rich with study/discussion.  I am happy to have these couples, but am sad to think of what will come of other relationships from the previous small group. 

I’ve been realizing more and more lately that I need friends.  I know I will probably never have friendships like I had in Florida, and that’s OK.  I really just don’t know how to make friends outside of school, church or work.  Considering none of these are really an option right now, I feel stuck.  I was supposed to have jury duty but could not think of a single person to baby-sit.  The few people I know that might be available/willing are already busy with their own children and I really don’t want to be a burden.  (plus I’ll get $10/day of jury duty and I don’t know anyone to hire for $.80/hour.)  You might remember the tid bit of Sansotta trivia from Memorial Day weekend- due to the whole babysitting thing, Myles and I have only had one date since Molli was born- 10 months ago.  Not cool.  I saw a previous co-worker yesterday who offered to baby-sit sometime, so I’m totally going to take her up on that offer!

This was probably not the most exciting post, but it’s what you get today. Happier post another day.  Meanwhile, I have to go rescue Molli from falling out of her toy-box and onto her face.