In light of the tragedy this morning, I am closing the day
with my children held a little closer to my heart. Our bedtime hugs were a little tighter, and our kiss a bit
more meaningful. I held on to
their gaze for an extra second each time they looked to me today and I allowed
the blessing of their presence to be recognized. Each moment has only one chance in history, and it deserves
to be intentional.
Gavin, my chunker, it has been so incredible to observe your
personality unfold, little by little.
You are such a joy. When
you smile, your whole face smiles and your body stiffens when you’re really
excited. Your mouth opens wide,
bragging your shiny pink gums.
You’re discovering your voice and using it with pride. Your squeals attract everyone in earshot
and are a delight. You’ve mastered
rolling over so you flip flop back and forth constantly. The other day we were at Grammy and
Papa’s house and you rolled halfway across the living room to get to the
Christmas tree. You enjoyed
yourself under it, batting at the low branches and ornaments. Sleep is not your strong point, but I
guess part of this is my fault. I
am still figuring out where I stand on sleep training so you’ve been with Mommy
and Daddy at night. I’m tired 99%
of the time, but do adore watching your sweet, sleeping body at night. The pouty lips that adorn your face
melts me, almost as much as your coos of affection. You are such a chunky
little guy, I’ve seriously never seen legs like yours! I can’t believe how different you are
from your sister, who is your biggest fan.
Miss Molli… where to even begin? You’re a crazy little spitfire, loving life right now. It’s Christmas time so we’ve been
setting your foundation for holiday celebrating. You’re very into Ella, your Elf on the Shelf, the song
“Santa Claus is Coming to Town,” your “guys” (fisher price little people),
coloring, Christmas decorations (especially lights), snacks and blankets. Your favorite color is orange, favorite
food is probably granola bars, and you love copying people (for better or for
worse). You still adore bath time
and now you get very excite when Gavin gets to join you. You’ve been introduced to the big girl
bed, but still enjoy your crib.
Lately you constantly say “let’s talk about a story” and force us to
tell stories all day long. It’s
not my favorite activity, but it has provided opportunities to tell about why
we celebrate Christmas, and since you NEVER forget anything, it’s been awesome
to hear your rendition of Jesus’ birth story. Carson is your best friend and I think you are in denial
that he is moving soon (I might be too). The alphabet is coming along, although
you typically end up spouting off any letters or numbers you can remember. You usually know to say the letters of
your name, but you said your letters out loud as I wrote it once, “M, O, L, L,
llittle L, polka-dot.” You have more personality than I’ve ever seen in a
child. There truly is never a dull
moment when you’re around. Two
year old you has been stretching my patience as well as my emotional and
physical endurance. The brunt of
potty training is under our belt, thank goodness. I’m positive this list could go on and on.
I am blessed to have you both and I promise that I will do
my best to love, protect and guide you through life. I can’t control what happens in this world, and that
terrifies me. As your mommy, I
want to keep you safe in my arms and never let anything happen to you. I also want you to live and have
fantastic experiences. I hope the
balance finds us.
I am deeply sorry for the families involved in the shooting
in Connecticut this morning. My
heart aches as I try to fathom such loss and incredible grief. While my grief does not change anything
for these people, it ignites a passion inside of me to absorb the memories with
my precious babies and hold them securely. I know better than to take them for granted, but days like
this fill my eyes with tears for those hurting and for the fullness I
have. Eighteen families sent their
kindergarteners, their babies, off to school this morning and do not have them
tuck in tonight. My heart breaks…
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