Naptime. I always have these beautiful ideas of what it will look like, especially when it’s snowy and peaceful outside. I imagine that I will lay my angels in their respective sleeping places, all cozy and yawning. They will curl up on their side and yawn as I walk out of the room. Gavin will sigh and Molli will mutter the words most precious to my heart, “I love you, Mommy.” I will admire their stillness and reflect on the love I have for my family as I complete a quiet chore or two. Each piece of laundry I fold will be done with intention and memory of when it last adorned my child and what we did that day. I will sweep the crumbs leftover from lunch and reflect on our blessings. Afterwards I will prepare dinner and sit down for a cup of tea and read until the kids call for me.
I’m not sure that exact scenario has ever actually taken place. Each of those things has occurred individually but rarely more than one per naptime. More realistically, by the time I get one child to bed, the other is screaming, for one reason or another. My big plans to clean the house and prepare dinner are a joke and in the end my tea is cold and my kindle is dead. I hastily clean up from lunch, switch the laundry and work to break my PR at speed folding, as though I’m training for the mom-Olympics. One kid gives in and sleeps, the other decides it’s tantrum time and wakes the sleeper. Are you kidding?! This time is spent undoing messes that continue unraveling.
Today, however, after some fights all around, both kids gave in at the same time and are sleeping. The video monitors prove what I would otherwise doubt. It’s beautiful. They are sleeping and I am not crossing a single thing off my list. I don’t care about mopping, scrubbing toilets, or showering. Today, I am sitting by a window with my tea still hot and I’m enjoying the quiet, the peacefulness of sleeping kids and admiring the soft snow outside.