long awaited update on life.

I’ve been harassed for neglecting this blog, so sorry.  There have been a million changes going on since I last updated and it got to the point where I’d realize that I need to update, but became overwhelmed with everything that should have been recorded, so I do what I always do with journals:  I pretend they don’t exist anymore.  This blog still exists, but is admittedly neglected.  So here goes. 

How do I even begin?  Very generally, I suppose…

I’m pregnant!  We’re expecting a little boy this summer- due July 8.  I know, we were surprised too.  I found out in November, right before we loaded up the car to head to Indiana for a job interview.  I had taken a test the week before because I was madly thirsty (apparently my earliest symptom) and it was negative.  The extreme thirst continued and the second test validated what my body was telling me. Pregnant.  Oh dear.  We stopped to get sodas on the way out of town and I subtly told Myles that I wanted a caffeine free drink.  He looked at me and questioned if I was pregnant.  Yes.  Birth control? Failed.  I was incredibly regular with taking it but, it’s not 100%  We are very happy about out upcoming baby, but definitely surprised and we knew we needed to make a lot of changes.

We knew we couldn’t fit another person in our little house comfortably, and we definitely needed more support.  So, we sold, donated and packed up everything we own and have moved!  Molli and I are currently living in Alaska, with my parents, and Myles will be joining us shortly.  He’s on the road at this very moment.  I’m excited to have him back. 

Since I’ve been here I’ve been wrestling with insurance complications.  I’ll spare you the details but it’s been a mess.  And I do not like messes…especially messes that involve too many phone calls, very few answers, and a general ill at ease feeling.  I’m not at ease yet and there is nothing I can do about it. 

I’m about to start working again.  I’m honestly very sad about it.  When my phone rang and I saw that it was an unfamiliar number from this area, my heart sank.  I knew it was the call I’ve been dreading- The call informing me of when I start.  The time I’ve gotten to stay home with Molli has been incredible and I wouldn’t trade it for the world.  It’s depressing to think about leaving her with someone else, and pay that person to do what I want to be doing- playing with, teaching and guiding her as she grows.  Yes, it would help us financially, but instances where a babysitter is necessary, I’d have to fork over literally half of what I earn.   This job would be flexible enough that I could work primarily evenings and weekends, but this also means I’d be missing out on husband time.  Family is so important and I really am having a hard time justifying giving up my time with them to make a small sum of money doing a job I don’t care about.  I wish I could summon passion for working, but I just can’t right now.  My mind automatically wanders to the near future when the new baby arrives.  It makes me cry to think about having to work and leave my Molli baby and my new baby home (and of course then deal with pumping).  I just don’t know.  My attitude is terrible about the working situation.  I really hope it changes soon though.  I need to do what is necessary for my family, but don’t know how to make my heart lean in that direction. 

Molli is growing up so, so much.  She’s still the same wild little thing she always has been, but now has an attitude to back it up. She’s getting feisty and I’m constantly on my toes with her.  She’s talking more and playing so much more grown up than before.  Everything she does is fast and intense, except eating.  Her attention span does not permit for solid meals these days.  Rather, she prefers to tear up her food and throw it on the ground.  I can’t even tell you how much time we’ve spend on the floor, post meal, picking up messes. We play “Pick it up and put it on the plate” a few times a day.  She loves her Grammy and Papa and asks for them all day long.  It’s adorable to watch them interact. 

I’m just so thankful that my parents have been gracious enough to let us in.  They are taking great care of us and seem to be loving having us (Molli) around. 

(sorry there are no pictures, I don't have my lap top in AK so I can't upload any!)