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Saturday, June 4, 2011

Cherish each moment, live in the present and appreciate your sweet child for who he/she is on this day.

A post without pictures is a poor post, indeed.  But that is what I have tonight.  Just words, no pictures.

It seems that each day, I reminisce a little bit about times past.  Sometimes about times long since past, and some more recent.  Today I was remembering Molli's birthday and how phenomenal it was.  It was by far the most powerfully emotional experience of my life!  I have several friends who have just recently had babies, and one who will very soon.  Each glance at a face of a newborn baby brings me right back to when Molli was so teeny tiny.  I so wish I could get her back like that, just for a little while.  I want to see her dreamy smiles and silly "O" face again.  I want her to lay on me just because that's all she knows to do.  I want to feel her little baby squirms in a swaddled bundle again.  I miss the days where she would stay put.

But not as much as I love what's happening these days.

These days I have a baby girl who is a mover!  She is stubborn as all get out and she has a personality all of her own.  She has an opinion already and she makes it known.  She is never still on purpose and her face has a million different expressions every minute.  She goes, goes, goes and when she stops to catch her breath, I grab hold of her really tight and snuggle the heck out of her.  She makes me laugh everyday.  These days are so fun!  My girl has six teeth, lots of hair and a sense of humor.  My girl likes attention and knows how to get it.  My girl makes me crazy sometimes, but more often she really melts my heart.

Sometimes I just have to pause and stare at her in amazement.  No one else will ever look at me quite the way she does.  When she is dancing and full of smiles, she looks at me as though she is dancing just to please me.  She claps her hands and looks up at me for approval.  She is my little buddy and I am honored.

I'm also terrified.

There is a lot of scary stuff in the world and somehow I'm supposed to be the one who guides her into and through it all?  I'm not sure I'm ready to think about her being exposed to all the bad things out there.  People can be mean, and I'm sure she will experience that one day.  Can't I keep her in my arms all the time? Our world is cruel and guides girls to feel badly about themselves.  How do I instill in her a Godly sense of beauty and ensure that she will never slight herself?  Someday, someone will make her cry.  Someday she will feel hurt.  Someday she will feel embarrassed.  My heart breaks to think about these things.

I know that I won't always be able to rescue her from the negativities of this world, but I know for sure that right now, she is my baby.  I love her in each stage of her life and will strive to live a life of gratitude and be an example for her.  Knowing that once time is gone, it's gone.  I will cherish each moment, live in the present and appreciate my sweet child for who she is on this day.  I hope anyone reading this will do the same.

3 comments:

  1. You make me extremely proud to be your mom and I can only hope that some of the goodness I see in you and your enjoyment of your baby came from the relationship you and I have. I love you very much!! Now please move closer to us!

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  2. You are such a wonderful mom to miss molli :) it makes me excited to have a daughter someday. You are such an amazing example of love.

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  3. I found myself sobbing while reading this... :)

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